Liz escorts an elderly couple to their room where she knows they will kill each other. They simultaneously shoot each other in the head. Liz thinks that their pact to die by each other's side is beautiful, but Iris is annoyed at the amount of scrubbing required. Liz breaks into tears, still reminded of Tristan. She contemplates her own suicide but is stopped by Iris with the reminder that her ghost will be stuck on the premises if she has unfinished business. Liz always planned to make things right with her son. Iris reveals that she too plans her own death, now that she doesn't have Donovan to live for. Together they make a suicide pact to be enacted once their affairs are in order.
Hazel brokers a vacation to the Cortez for Liz's son, whom she hasn't seen in 31 years. She cautions Liz to be cautious of how accepting her son will be. Liz presents a gift in exchange: a bottle of modern oxygen infused laundry soap.
John attends a Santa Muerte service, where he stabs and slashes the leader and two attendants, collecting his ninth trophy: their ears for listening to a false prophet.
Donovan sneaks into Rudy's hotel room through the window, where he confronts the iconic actor. They spar over who can love Elizabeth better. Meanwhile, Natacha confronts Elizabeth during their tête-à-tête at the Cortez; Natacha draws a knife. At the motel, Rudy draws a scimitar. Each of the modern lovers shoots their rival in the head.
March, wearing his elaborate mask, holds the construction contractor captive, chiding him for not keeping to his construction schedule commitment. John enters moments after March immolates the man alive. John asks March where to find Alex.
The two arrive for a more formal dinner set by Hazel. They discuss the fallout from Holden and their decisions since rediscovering him. John is distressed that they have abandoned Scarlett, and Alex says that it is for the best that she leave Scarlett with him. She is dealing with the consequences from the pack of afflicted schoolchildren she inadvertently helped create, and Elizabeth will kill her and Holden if she doesn't fix the situation. John offers to help.
Hazel advises Liz that her son is approaching the bar. Liz serves Douglas, who works for a storage-unit company. As time wears on, they talk about Douglas' life and his lost dreams. Liz does not tell Douglas that she is his biological father. Douglas talks about his father's abandonment and their chance of reconnection. Liz offers to buy him another drink, but Douglas shies away with a "maybe next time."
John and Alex investigate the kids' hideout house, marked with police tape. They find the front door unlocked. Inside, the corpses have disappeared but the bloody floor remains. John investigates noises upstairs. Alex finds Kimmy, sick on the floor. Max comes upon Alex and slashes her arm before John fires a warning shot. Max is unintimidated as the large pack of children surrounds the two adults. Max warns that they told Alex not to come back. Kimmy begins gagging and Maddy pleads with Alex to save her despite Max's protests. Sadly, Alex is unable to save her with CPR.
In her hotel room, the police interview Elizabeth about the disappearance of her newlywed husband. She claims to have never seen him after he said "I do." Suddenly, Will enters and claims he got lost for a couple of days while exploring the new renovations. Once they are gone, he confronts her about his murder. She says it was due to his remarks about Bartholomew, and he claims that is just a pretext. He wants to know what to do about his legacy, and cautions her that she can't just liquidate it since she's not in his will. She reminds him that Lachlan has inherited it and that she's his legal guardian until he reaches adulthood, if he ever does. She says she wouldn't kill Lachlan, but she would turn him. After Will leaves, March materializes and says he advised her not to kill Drake on premises.
The pack, hiving finally been persuaded, arrives at the hotel, and Alex guides them to the lost hallway and tries to usher them behind the sealed door. Reluctantly, they do, but Jimmy, undoubtedly suspicious, refuses before John pushes him in and seals the door. Despite banging and begging, the pack's calls go unheard. Jimmy then shouts at Max that they should have never trusted Alex and they start to scuffle. They stop upon finding Will's drained body and a blood covered Ramona appears, who states that she "smells appetizers."
John and Alex celebrate their victory with sex. She is wary afterward, since they're supposed to be divorcing. He questions the need to divorce now that she's found Holden. She walks away, interested in "this new John Lowe." Sally materializes after she leaves and questions whether or not she is his "whore." He says that what he and Sally have is an addict's high. They begin to have sex, but he suddenly pushes her away. Sally wonders what Alex will do when she finds out that John is now a serial killer, or if Alex will accept him as Sally does. John says they have to try, for the sake of their two children, but Sally doubts his reasons and reminds him that she was there for him for five years. He walks away again and she says she deserves more. She comes at him with a switchblade, and he subdues her while she screams that he'll be back. The Addiction Demon flickers in and out of focus behind her.
Liz and Iris present an elated Hazel with a hybrid washer and dryer unit in gratitude for helping him with his son. As they leave, they begin to plan their double suicide. Hazel calls after them, telling Liz that Douglas awaits him in the bar. Douglas tells Liz that they are going to be following his dreams in Boulder, as Liz suggested. Liz becomes tongue-tied while trying to tell her son the truth, but Douglas has already deduced it and knew from the beginning that Liz is his father. Liz apologizes for having abandoned him, but he is well adjusted and has his wife for a sympathetic ear. Liz is still skeptical that he is not more unnerved at his father now being a woman, but Douglas responds that reality television prepared him and that "There's plenty of room for another woman in [his] life."
Elizabeth and Donovan discuss recent events, and Donovan laughs at her "hate-watching" Will's death by Ramona without him. She responds that they can dump another body in soon for fun, but that he must retrieve Will's decaying body and place Ramona back in the neon iron maiden. He glibly says that while he's cleaning up her mess, she can clean up his. Elizabeth's eyes widen as he alludes to having killed Rudy. She finds the film icon's body and weeps over it.
An elated Liz breaks the news to Iris, who has just completed crafting a tribute video online and has laid out a selection of suicide implements on the bed. Iris is upset at having been abandoned again, now by her best friend. Liz says that "women of a certain age" should be running the world, and are entitled to another chance. The bartender says that the best is yet to come, and envisions grand plans of taking over the hotel.
Alex shows John to the game room, and Holden embraces his daddy. He tells his son it's time to go home, and the family walks to the doors. Sally yells at them from a balcony, yelling that she's going to kill John.
Alone, Donovan dances in the penthouse. When Elizabeth enters, she says that she is surprised that he didn't run. Donovan responds that she would have found him. She says she couldn't find Rudy for a century, because he was trapped. Donovan replies that they are all trapped in this Hotel, and that while Rudy "made" Elizabeth, Elizabeth "made" Donovan in Rudy's image. However, he couldn't compete with her memory of Rudy, and so Rudy had to be eliminated at the first chance. Donovan knew that Elizabeth would come back to kill him, but he doesn't mind if dying is the only way Elizabeth will let him love her. She is charmed that he's willing to sacrifice everything for her. The tender moment is interrupted by Liz and Iris, who break into the penthouse armed with guns from their suicide arsenal. They each hold a gun in each hand and begin shooting at the couple.
- Rudolph Valentino: "I am the greatest screen lover of all time."
Cast and characters
- Denis O'Hare as Liz Taylor
- Sarah Paulson as Sally McKenna
- Evan Peters as James March
- Wes Bentley as John Lowe
- Chloë Sevigny as Alex Lowe
- Finn Wittrock as Rudolph Valentino
- Matt Bomer as Donovan
- Cheyenne Jackson as Will Drake
- Mare Winningham as Hazel Evers
- Angela Bassett as Ramona Royale
- Kathy Bates as Iris
- Lady Gaga as Elizabeth
- Lennon Henry as Holden Lowe
- Alexandra Daddario as Natacha Rambova
- Anton Lee Starkman as Max Ellison
- Ava Acres as Madeline
- A quote that Donovan says after he kills Rudolph is, "I have cheekbones for days." This is a reference to Elizabeth's favorite quote, " You have a jawline for days. "
- ↑ http://www.thefutoncritic.com/listings.aspx?id=20151116fx02
- ↑ FX Networks, American Horror Story - Hotel